1:41am Happy New Year!
May this year kick some serious love. I want more love, more tattoos, more travel, bring it fuckin ON!
December 2009
formspring.me
do you always wear condoms what does it mean when a guy is ‘thick as pig shit’
Yes, I always wear condoms and you should too. Thick as pig shit is a colourful way of saying really stupid.
formspring.me
how old were you when you got your first tattoo? and how many do you have now?
I think I was 25 or 26. I have ten at the moment and Id like to have my arms and sides done.
“
i remember a story i heard about another country more sensible than ours. where whores visit the mental institutions every month. the government pays for this sex, this touching, this connection. it is not prozac or ritalin. it is not in gel capsules or chewable. it doesn’t have to be taken with food. it is body shaped.
the slow, the strange, the confused, the disabled, the ill, the unstable, the retarded, the insane, the special, the different, they do not stop being human; they don’t have less yearning.
this is why i do this work. the drunkards and horny men are less obvious than william in their need. but it is all the same. our culture has created a void of touch. that sometimes gets filled in the most violent ways.
” —story of story
Whats on your mind? →
formspring.me
Ask/tell me something xo
3:57am
Went out with the girls to some swanky bar at the harbour in the rich part of town tonight for christmas eve. Hotties everywhere I looked but after 1/2 an hour all turned out thick as pig shit. Thats Aussie men for you. I was still determined to find a lover for the night. We ended up getting a taxi to some dodgy club in the middle of nowhere but I made up for it by giving my number to a hot guy with tattoos who I originally thought was a member of a local biker gang. He sent me some sweet texts after we left. We went onto another club with my girlfriend’s man and his flatmate who was a cute surfer if only he’d cut his hair, I decided he’d be the one to do the honours until my girl’s man lost his shit with some guy for walking past her. Talk about short man syndrome! So his little tantrum cock blocked me as I had to make a mad dash into a taxi with my girl after her fight with her man. Texted the hottie from the bar and he offered to come get me but it was a no go.
Tomorrow christmas day with another girlfriend, her family and their indoor pool.
Boxing day consists of dancing my ass off at Breakfest and Pendulum, then back to work on Sunday.
Idea
While I love, love, love living in Australia and never want to leave, I have serious itchy feet and a deep desire to change my life. I often think about going to do some sort of aid work in other countries and I just found this site Volunteers For Peace which has inspired me to save up to go do some projects for them.
My visa and rental contract run out in April, Ive been planning on getting a student visa and staying here as a student so I dont have to leave, but I really want to travel and I have no real idea what I want to study. I have no career aspirations, only travel dreams.
Anyone have any thoughts/advice?
“every atom in your body came from a star that exploded. and, the atoms in your left hand probably came from a different star then your right hand. it really is the most poetic thing i know about physics: you are all stardust. you couldn’t be here if stars hadn’t exploded, because the elements - the carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, iron, all the things that matter for evolution and for life - weren’t created at the beginning of time. they were created in the nuclear furnaces of stars, and the only way for them to get into your body is if those stars were kind enough to explode. so, forget jesus. the stars died so that you could be here today.”
—lawrence krauss (via jenini/writer-a) (via piratekitten) (via delacroix)
1:07am
Today I woke up at my friends place because her flatmate was watching me sleep. W lay in bed talking for an hour about scarey dreams we’d had, then went and had spinach and ricotta cakes with bacon and holandaise sauce. After which we hit the beach with our hot Hungarian friend, I got stung by something in the water and we later hit the beach club where we fucked with the young boys and laughed. We chowed down on an awesome burger while waiting for my super hot, buff 20yr old toy boy to pick us up cos I was too drunk to drive home. Before we went home, my girlfriend and I skinny dipped in the nighttime ocean while he watched and laughed then he and I had a quick sweaty fuck at my place before I sent him home. I love how he does what he’s told and is happy to play the role and then get out of my hair.
So tired and I cant sleep cos its so hot - a humid 27 degrees celcius (81F) at this time of night!
formspring.me
baby, he doesn’t want you. if he wanted you the way you should be wanted, he would come to terms with what you do for a living. and thats all there is to it - stop making yourself unhappy by torturing yourself about it. take a deep breath, and be ok with it. it is that easy, make it that easy.
I know this and thats what hurts because I thought he could handle anything, I thought Id finally met a man with balls, finally met the guy Id been asking for, for so long. But I was wrong and I didnt see it coming. It is that easy, thank you :) xo
formspring.me
hey there beautiful… I just want to say that I can tell that you’re an awesome girl who deserves to be with a great guy. The Holidays are actually a great time to open up your heart. You never know when your true love is going to show up. I love your Tumblr. You cheer me up every day. XOXO H.
Thank you so much for your msg, it really made me feel better. Im going out dancing tonight with a girlfriend for the first time in a long time and I feel positive :)
formspring.me
I’ve been following you’re tumblr for a while and your posts recently are incredibly sad. i just want to let you know that you have every right to feel sad, angry, whatever and it’s really important to give yourself time to hurt and heal. In the end, you’ll still be a beautiful, strong woman. These are words I wish that I had been told by someone other than my therapist and I hope that they help you out. at the very least, I hope they put a smile on your face.
Thank you so much for your kind words. Yes, it seems for 3 days I was numb and then on Thurs I began to wobble and yesterday was a purging. Today I feel much better :) Thank you for your support.
formspring.me
What do you mean by “the media’s control of people” in England? I don’t feel there’s any less of that in Oz…
Its not the same here in Oz. Its far less. You dont have as many tabloid newspapers that scare-monger and trash talk as harshly as the UK ones do. Ive noticed a distinct change in my stress levels since living in OZ becos Im not being bombarded with bullshit left right and centre. Its like having a bully follow you around in the UK.
12:50pm
For the first time this week, I woke up without thoughts of him. In fact it took a little while before he popped back in my mind and I was so surprised to realise this and even more surprised to not continue thinking about him.
Maybe the final purge has come.
Hitting the beach with a girlfriend :)
4:51am
Finally in bed, what a fucking rough day. Punched the wall at work, chased two Valiums with a couple shots of Jagermeister and a glass of Champagne. Had another 4 glasses and a Jager thru the night, eventually hit exhaustion and went home.
This heartache needs to end.
That boy is a monster.
He ate my heart.
“Gas is so expensive now that when I fill up my tank I just whip out my cock and jerk it - Cos wen I spend that kinda money, Im used to CUMMIN!”
—Chris Rock, Kill The Messenger
“Wake up. Get out of bed and stop hiding under the duvet, no matter how warm it is. You will get nothing accomplished. Put some clothes on. Wear the red tights with the mustard yellow shoes. Arrange the 3 day old curls in your hair. Do something nice for yourself today. Get pretty for absolutely no reason other than to prove to yourself that you’re not worthless and sloven. Go to your favorite record store and listen to the old man’s playlist that usually consists of Howlin’ Wolf and strange 60s Middle Eastern music. Buy yourself your favorite garlic and tomato burrito, and make sure you get extra guacamole. Drive past Emily Dickinson’s house and imagine the lack of life she had. Spend the extra money on your favorite art magazine and plan a trip to Sweden in your head. Sing your favorite songs in your car. Make a pit stop to the reservoir. Collect the last leaves from autumn. Watch the sun sink into the horizon.Don’t stare at your phone and wait for it to vibrate. Don’t mope. Don’t think about the only men in your life that have belittled you this week. Don’t sit. Don’t wait. Don’t look at the time that you’ve always set to three hours behind. Don’t delay your life even though someone has attempted to delay yours.”
—
(via where-the-heart-is) (via eatidealdinner)
For thedame, a nice Tumblr-er who is going through a hard time. <3
(via weallbelong) Thank you very much :) I did dress ok today and put on my face, Im waiting for pizza to cook and watching Where the Wild Things Are to distract myself from crying :) Thank you so much for being there for me.
“Perspective is what shuts out the Universe.”
—Taking Woodstock
“I know you feel like you are breaking down. I know that it gets so hard sometimes. Be calm. Take it from me, I’ve been there a thousand times. You hate your pulse because it thinks you’re still alive, and everything’s wrong. It just gets so hard sometimes. Be calm.”
—fun. (via weallbelong)
it feels like my heart is being cut out with a blunt spoon :(
“Name ten things you wanna do before you die and then go do them.
Name ten places you really wanna be before you die and then go to them.
Name ten books you wanna read before you die and then go read them.
Name ten songs you wanna hear again before you die, get all of your friends together and scream them.
Because right now all you have is time, time, time.
Yeah, but someday that time will run out.
That’s the only thing you can be absolutely certain about.” —Paul Baribeau (via weallbelong)
Name ten places you really wanna be before you die and then go to them.
Name ten books you wanna read before you die and then go read them.
Name ten songs you wanna hear again before you die, get all of your friends together and scream them.
Because right now all you have is time, time, time.
Yeah, but someday that time will run out.
That’s the only thing you can be absolutely certain about.” —Paul Baribeau (via weallbelong)
my cat is sitting in my crotch and has started purring
is this bestiality?
“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
—Sylvia Plath (via projectlyric)